emotion

Lately, I feel like I am full of emotion, which is SO unlike me naturally. I hide my feelings; it's my go-to reaction. The smallest things had driven me crazy lately. I feel so out of place in my own home. My roommates make comments about my distance, but I don't want to close the distance. I don't have the desire to be around them. I feel left out and hurt. I don't understand where that is coming from. I am so full of fear. I am fearful of where I stand in relationships with my friends. I am fearful of where I stand in ministry. I feel like I have spent the past three years of ministry being overshadowed. Nothing I can do is as good as what others do. I am hurt. I don't understand where these emotions are coming from, or why they have surfaced now. In saying all of this, the Lord is good. He has continually brought me back to Him. Through these struggles, I have found peace in Him. The emotions haven't disappeared, but I know there will be light in them. When journaling a couple days ago I remember writing this sentence: Conform me to You; use my struggles to reveal Your goodness. I echo that here. I want to be conformed to the image of Christ. I really do. Life is hard, but God's purpose is greater.